To Here and Back Again

[PorpoiseMuffins]

And as for me, well, I just use this site as a place to take a s***, so whatever.

Nice

Absolutely. Has anything I've posted in the last...God, at least five years now...led you to believe otherwise?

No, which is why you probably shouldn't be critiquing anyone else's behavior.

[Neon Black]

Honestly, I don't remember what happened And it's not really relevant now. At this point in my life, Internet forum drama no longer consumes much space in my mind.

Its a blank to me as well, but I am curious. Was I banned? All I remember was leaving all Sonic boards after I released that scene from the fan film. Once that was posted, I just...vanished

I am straining my memory here but yes, you were banned. Several times. As I'm sure you do in fact remember. This was shortly after Ben Hurst's passing and in the wake of that, you took it as an opportunity to self-aggrandise. When people took issue with your behaviour, you doubled down on it and I banned you. You also made several alternate accounts in the months/years afterward which got banned. I recall you started sockpuppeting for a while, pretending to be someone else who had signed up to say nice things about you and defend you, until I banned that account as well.

I'm afraid your reputation is sealed, my friend. I must agree (albeit more politely) than Lynch on this one, we've heard this whole reformation narrative before and I'm just not buying it. You don't need to explain yourself to everyone and tbh, if your intent is to regain some respect from the handful of us left in the community, it's probably in your own best interests that you don't.

[TheRecoveredVet]

Honestly, I don't remember what happened And it's not really relevant now. At this point in my life, Internet forum drama no longer consumes much space in my mind.

Its a blank to me as well, but I am curious. Was I banned? All I remember was leaving all Sonic boards after I released that scene from the fan film. Once that was posted, I just...vanished

I am straining my memory here but yes, you were banned. Several times. As I'm sure you do in fact remember. This was shortly after Ben Hurst's passing and in the wake of that, you took it as an opportunity to self-aggrandise. When people took issue with your behaviour, you doubled down on it and I banned you. You also made several alternate accounts in the months/years afterward which got banned. I recall you started sockpuppeting for a while, pretending to be someone else who had signed up to say nice things about you and defend you, until I banned that account as well.

I'm afraid your reputation is sealed, my friend. I must agree (albeit more politely) than Lynch on this one, we've heard this whole reformation narrative before and I'm just not buying it. You don't need to explain yourself to everyone and tbh, if your intent is to regain some respect from the handful of us left in the community, it's probably in your own best interests that you don't.

Don't you think that's a bit harsh? I mean it seems that you're judging me based on events that occurred nearly a decade ago. As I mentioned, I made peace with my past transgressions cause I learned after I removed myself from online communities, that I was a toxic person who needed to heal. If you want to know what my situation was back in 2010, heres the overview.

I was broke and struggling to find employment. I ended up moving back with my parents. I was stuck in a household full of negative family members who were mentally abusive to where I ended up saying at friends houses every few nights. The Sonic Fan Film was the only thing holding my motivation together cause so much was already completed with its pre-production that I had to at least get something from it animated. I figured that it was my only that Id be able to dig myself out of a hole, which resulted in my aggressive and egotistical attitude. So when you take a broken down, unemployed 20 something who's constantly berated from family members who viewed him as a pathetic loser, the result is a person that's unstable and irrational. So yeah, not exactly a proud moment in my life that I wanna remember. Its why after I got that Fan Film crap out of my system, I moved on. Posted that infamous Metal vs Sonic scene and vanished.

But ever since I left (or banned I guess), I focused mainly on my personal life and career. Pretty much repressing any memories of what occurred during that era cause it didn't seem healthy to dwell on them. If I need a refresher, Ill visit my Encyclopedia Dramatica page. So far, my activity here has been very minimal and I haven't really contributed to any Sonic related threads yet. I understand if you need to be on your toes, but Im in my 30s now. So much has changed in terms of my personality and mind-set that would at least merit some type of redemption. And I wouldn't say Im here to win respect, but it would be nice to make amends with those I hurt. However, if you sincerely feel compelled to lay the ban hammer on me so prematurely like this, then whatever. Its just a internet forum. I only returned due to my renewed interest in Sonic and would assume that we'd all be mature enough to brush off incidents that are no longer relevant.

[Sonicroc]

That sounds a lot like the very sucky situation my best friend was in for awhile. Definitely took a toll on him at the time.

That also might explain why the fan film was so... angry... and sadistic... and... evillll..... O_O

Reading the storyboarded movie temporarily ruined SatAM for me, and I think the quite-bothersome portrayal of Sonic and Sally's relationship turned me off the whole Sonally thing for good.

So for the sake of SatAM (and, to a lesser extent, The Secret of NIMH), I think it's for the best you didn't get the funding...

Sorry, lol, no hard feelings! It's cool to hear from you again. Just needed to get that off my chest, as of a couple years ago, lol...

EDIT: ... I feel bad now. It's clear you (and the other artists) put a lot of blood, sweat, and tears into the storyboard. Some of the shaded pencil drawings are quite beautiful, which gave certain parts a really epic feel. Plus, you attempted something I never have, namely, writing a feature-length story, an incredibly daunting task to me.

I guess, ultimately, here's what it came down to. Back in the day, I was really excited about the project, the idea of a SatAM movie. But as I read it, I felt it expressed a negative way of seeing things that I strongly disagree with on a philosophical level. It was scary to see one of my favorite childhood series turned around against me... In retrospect, I suppose the fact that I took it so seriously proves that it was an immersive experience, which is impressive considering it was only a PDF of storyboards, lol...

[Sonicroc]

(Fyi, I edited my previous post. Just making sure you saw it, in case you're reading the posts in your email inbox, as I sometimes do.)

[TheRecoveredVet]

That sounds a lot like the very sucky situation my best friend was in for awhile. Definitely took a toll on him at the time.

That also might explain why the fan film was so... angry... and sadistic... and... evillll..... O_O

Reading the storyboarded movie temporarily ruined SatAM for me, and I think the quite-bothersome portrayal of Sonic and Sally's relationship turned me off the whole Sonally thing for good.

So for the sake of SatAM (and, to a lesser extent, The Secret of NIMH), I think it's for the best you didn't get the funding...

Sorry, lol, no hard feelings! It's cool to hear from you again. Just needed to get that off my chest, as of a couple years ago, lol...

EDIT: ... I feel bad now. It's clear you (and the other artists) put a lot of blood, sweat, and tears into the storyboard. Some of the shaded pencil drawings are quite beautiful, which gave certain parts a really epic feel. Plus, you attempted something I never have, namely, writing a feature-length story, an incredibly daunting task to me.

I guess, ultimately, here's what it came down to. Back in the day, I was really excited about the project, the idea of a SatAM movie. But as I read it, I felt it expressed a negative way of seeing things that I strongly disagree with on a philosophical level. It was scary to see one of my favorite childhood series turned around against me... In retrospect, I suppose the fact that I took it so seriously proves that it was an immersive experience, which is impressive considering it was only a PDF of storyboards, lol...

No hard feelings at all. I find it interesting how you dissected the morbid tone of the film as a reflection of my frustration making it. I remember being stressed out since I pretty much mortgaged my social life for months on end communicating with artists and voice actors. This was directly after Sega of Japan emailed me that rejection letter, so I kept the momentum going by finishing it myself. Side note, the day Sega emailed me was the same day my friends band broke up so it was a double downer for me.

I was so burned out on a daily basis, cause I was freelancing full time and bouncing emails back with revisions of storyboards and voice edits. Multi-tasking designing album covers/flyers for my freelance gigs, voice directing and giving storyboard details. Plus there were many Skype calls involving disagreements and other back office drama. Threats of leaving if I didn't do this or that.

I devolved into a horrible egotist where everything had to be my way and I pushed hard on deadlines towards those who were still in school. Everyone was a wreck. I rarely went out unless it was work related, which of course dried up when the economy crashed in 2008. So then, I ended up moving back home with my parents with a project that was nearing completion. All that stood in my way was getting it animated so I did everything I could to drum up interest online despite the negative reputation I was receiving from both the Sonic community and my crew.

The Indiegogo was a failure cause I only raised a couple hundred dollars. So scaling back, I scouted around for cheap animators/studios and went with the one that I can afford. They sent me their demo reel and it looked impressive for the time hence, why I touted the film as having a smooth Don Bluth style. Well...when I paid to have a selected scene animated, the final result was not what I anticipated. The studio spent 4 months animating it from what I recall and considering how exhausted and ill-tempered Ive become, I said F-it, Im done. I invested half a decade on this and it was going nowhere. I'll just release this piece of animation, claim victory for completing "something" and then make my departure from all online communities. And it was honestly the best thing I ever did.

Once I regained my true focus in life, thats when I gradually started to rebuild myself. I landed a full time design job at a reputable company for 6 years. I expanded my freelance endeavors. Picked up new skills. Traveled. Basically became more extroverted cause I didnt have anything haunting me or dragging me down. When I took a step back and viewed the project, I realized how laughably dated and cringe it was. So maybe, I dodged a bullet by not pursuing it. So then from 2010-2016, I didnt really care about Sonic. I read news articles that would pop up on facebook or twitter but nothing to the extent of fanboying and posting my excitement. But late 2017 and early this year, that fanboy switch randomly turned back on. Sonic Mania was an incredible game with an awesome soundtrack. There were Hollywood articles circulating around about Jim Carry playing Eggman. The kid inside was just overjoyed that the dream of a Sonic movie was finally happening.

Btw, looking at your Sally avatar, its such a trip to see how much the freedom fighters have changed since 2010. I'm trying to catch up since I think issue 290 is the last and Im currently on 281 as of this post.

[Lynchenberg]

And as for me, well, I just use this site as a place to take a s***, so whatever.

Nice

Absolutely. Has anything I've posted in the last...God, at least five years now...led you to believe otherwise?

No, which is why you probably shouldn't be critiquing anyone else's behavior.

I just posted random s*** for the hell of it. Or to vent because no one comes here anymore to discuss this dated and (as I can finally see now that I'm nearly thirty), frankly not all that remarkable children's cartoon. No surprise, considering that it was intended for no other purpose than sell a cynical Poochie-esque mascot's video game and earn coin.

I've since stopped doing that for Neon Black's sake, as he actually does attempt to moderate here. But even if I hadn't, riddle me this one Flipper: don't you think there's a difference between s-h-i-t-posting and what Kuta's done?